This title kills me. I am laughing so hard my stomach aches. Shannon you are a great writer. You are so wonderful. I remember buying a pair of Ralph Lauren shorts at a mall in Waikiki for $115.00 in the ‘80’s. I grew fat, but they were worth it. The sports jacket however for $515.00 was a stupid purchase. I don’t make that kind of money. I only wore it a few times, then again I grew fat. Worse, I would brag about it. I once bought three suits at Men’s Warehouse. I may have worn the good one a few times, but the pleated front and the out-turned hems are out-dated. I never did go into law. Besides, the polyester suits were too embarrassing. Today, it’s Target jeans and T-shirts. I wear a uniform at work.