I hang out with a French woman who makes me feel this way. She wants to have a baby. She’s dated every man on the Internet and I keep hanging out with her, like the sky will crack and grant me my wish. I have no self-esteem. But, she did tell me her ex, an emergency room doctor, Stanford grad with loads of money, was as boring as a popsicle stick in a wrapper. She said, “No; He’s really boring.”